Ray Ortlund’s 10 Unforgettable Lessons on Fatherhood

In public, my dad was one of the great pastors of his generation. He served most notably for 20 fruitful years at Lake Avenue Congregational Church in Pasadena, where John and Noel Piper worshiped during their Fuller Seminary days. Dad and John were dear friends.

In private, my dad was the same man. There was only one Ray Ortlund, Sr.—an authentic Christian man. The distance between what I saw in the New Testament and what I saw in my dad was slight. He was the most Christlike man I’ve ever known: the kind of man, the kind of father, I long to be.

In no particular order, here are 10 lessons on fatherhood I learned from watching him, each lesson living on in my life from memories of his care for me.

1. He was never too busy.

My dad was a busy pastor, but he was never too busy for me. When he felt he hadn’t had enough time with me, he’d say, “Hey Bud, want to skip school tomorrow and go down to the beach?” It didn’t take me long to agree to that! So off we went. We surfed and talked and had fun together. The next day he’d write a note to the school to explain my absence, and when I took it to the principal’s office they always marked my absence “Unexcused.” I guess the reason didn’t count with them—a father wanting to catch up with his son. But dad didn’t care. I mattered to him. And I knew it.

2. He was a Bible man.

My dad was wholeheartedly devoted to Jesus. On my 17th birthday, he and my mom gave me a new Bible. In the front he wrote the following:


Nothing could be greater than to have a son—a son who loves the Lord and walks with Him. Your mother and I have found this Book our dearest treasure. We give it to you and doing so can give nothing greater. Be a student of the Bible and your life will be full of blessing. We love you.

Philippians 1:6

When I read that, I knew my dad meant every word of it. He was a Bible man, and the blessing he wrote about was obvious in his own life.

3. He praised God.

As a kid growing up, I didn’t need an alarm clock most mornings. I woke up to the sound of my dad singing in the shower down the hallway. Every morning he sang heartily and cheerfully this hymn:

   When morning gilds the skies
My heart awaking cries
May Jesus Christ be praised
Alike at work or prayer
To Jesus I repair
May Jesus Christ be praised

Many men are hard to read. I have no idea what they stand for. But I never wondered about my dad—what he cared most about, what he was living for. Never once. At all. Not even a little. He did not take a keep-a-low-profile approach to life. Jesus was too wonderful to him. He praised the Lord throughout his life, in public, in private, in a clear and winsome way that could not be ignored.

4. He cheered me on.

My dad set me free to pursue God’s call on my life. He guided me in appropriate ways, of course, but he did not fearfully cling to me or hope I would always live nearby. Just the opposite. He urged me to follow Christ anywhere. Now and then he’d make this speech: “Listen, son. Half-hearted Christians are the most miserable people of all. They know enough about God to feel guilty, but they haven’t gone far enough with Christ to be happy. Be all-out for him! I don’t care if you’re a ditch-digger, as long as you love the Lord with all your heart.”

He was not impressed with worldly success and going to the right schools and all that pretense and bluff. He wanted something better for me, something I had to find on my own. But I never doubted how urgently he desired for me a clear call from God on my life. And I did receive it, partly because my dad didn’t intrude himself into it but cheered me on as I followed the Lord myself.

5. He had a real walk with God.

I remember going downstairs early one morning and walking in on my dad in the living room. There he was, on his knees, his face buried in his hands, absorbed in silent prayer. He didn’t know anyone else was up. It wasn’t for show. It was real. My dad had a real walk with God. It never occurred to me to wonder if Jesus was the Lord of his heart and of our home. Dad loved the gospel. He served the church. He witnessed to our neighbors. He even tithed when he couldn’t afford it. He set the tone of our home, and our home was a place of joy, honesty and comfort. Jesus was there.

6. He taught me theology in the backyard.

One day when I was 11 or 12, while we were doing yard work outside—I can’t remember the context—my dad stopped, looked me in the eyes, and said, “You know, Bud, before time began, God chose you.” I was floored. Almighty God thought of tiny me? Way back then? I felt so loved by God. Years later, when I became aware of the doctrine of election as such, I had no problem with it. I loved it. My dad had begun my theological education in my boyhood in the course of everyday conversation.

7. He loved us when it wasn’t easy.

My mom told me once that dad had a practice as he came home at the end of each day. He worked hard throughout the day and he came home tired. So as he walked up the back steps, before he reached out to open the back door, he would lift a simple prayer to God, “Lord, I need some extra energy right now.” And God answered that prayer. I never saw my dad walk in with no positive emotion to give. Instead, he’d walk over to my mom, kiss her with a huge kiss, and then turn to me and say, “Come on, Skip, let’s wrestle!” And we’d go out to the front room and wrestle on the floor and tickle and laugh and have a blast. The moment-by-moment reality of God in my dad’s heart gave him energy to love his family when it wasn’t easy.

8. He helped me love the church.

The fact that dad was a pastor made me “the preacher’s kid,” obviously. Every now and then, well-meaning church people said foolish things to me, as if I had to be perfect or superior or something they expected. So dad said to me once, “Son, when people say things like that, they don’t mean any harm. But it isn’t fair. They don’t realize that. I want you to know, you can ignore it.”

Dad had high standards for Christian living. But he was wise enough to know that a 10-year-old follows Christ in a way different from a 40-year-old. He was realistic and compassionate. He made allowances for me to be a Christian kid. And he is the primary earthly reason why I love the church today. He wisely showed me how church life does not need to be oppressive.

9. He lived his faith simply and practically.

Dad showed me how to walk with the Lord in practical ways. For example, here is a statement he settled on as his own daily path:

My Morning Statement of Faith

I believe that today:

  1. God is sovereignly directing my life as I yield myself to him, and that he loves me unconditionally, and I love him and put him first in my life.
  2. Christ is my Lord and Master, and I seek to abide in him and do his will immediately and exactly.
  3. The Holy Spirit is my friend, teacher and guide, who will open and close doors today and fill me with himself to make me an effective servant.
  4. I now commit my wife and family to the Lord, who loves them as well as others I love. They too are in his sovereign care.
  5. I step out in bold faith and relax in the Lord, and enjoy this day given to me by him. I trust him to use me today.

It’s simple, but valid. Dad exemplified how to make daily Christianity accessible and practical.

10. He told me ministry isn’t everything.

Being a “preacher’s kid” was sometimes difficult, as I mentioned. But more than offsetting this difficulty was my dad’s love for me and my admiration for him. I adored him. I still do. Even as I write this, I choke up. I miss him so. Being the son of a godly pastor was a sacred privilege given to me as a gift from God himself. My respect for my dad and his personal attractiveness—the real Christianity I saw in him, the beauty with which he served as a pastor even when he suffered—the personal impact of it all was that I grew to revere the pastoral ministry. And today I am rejoicing to be a pastor myself. Which brings me to my final scenario.

Early on Sunday, July 22, 2007, my dad woke up in his hospital room in Newport Beach. He knew it was finally his day of release from this life. He had the nurse call the family in. My wife, Jani, and I were far away in Ireland for ministry that day. We didn’t know what was happening back home. But the family gathered at dad’s bedside. They read Scripture. They sang hymns. Dad spoke a word of patriarchal blessing and admonition to each one, a message suited to encourage and guide. He pronounced over them all the blessing of Aaron: “The Lord bless you and keep you; the Lord make his face to shine upon you and be gracious unto you; the Lord lift up his countenance upon you and give you peace” (Numbers 6:24–26).

And then, quietly, he fell asleep.

Later I asked my sister about dad’s message to me. It was this: “Tell Bud ministry isn’t everything. Jesus is.”

My dad’s dying words summed up his parenting and his whole life.

Via SermonCentral.com – http://www.sermoncentral.com/pastors-preaching-articles/ray-ortlund-ray-ortlunds-10-unforgettable-lessons-on-fatherhood-2207.asp

Poezii de ziua tatalui

Tata copil father kid son

Via Daniel Branzei – http://barzilaiendan.wordpress.com/2012/06/16/de-ziua-tatalui


Cind sunt copii nostri mici
Noi pentru ei suntem TATICI
Ce gingas e, si suna bine
TATICULE, mi-e dor de tine

Dar anii trec si deodata
Nu mai esti TATIC, acum esti TATA
Dar si asa tot suna bine
TATA, …imi este dor de tine

Dar cresc, nu le mai esti pe plac
Din TATA, tu devii BABAC
Si vorba suna trist si gol
BABACULE, …mai da-mi un pol

Dar viata e un foc de paie
Si vrei nu vrei, ajungi TATAIE
Iar vorba ta, in ras e luata
TATAIE,… ia mai las-o balta…

Si-n anii care-ti mai raman
Te vor numii doar AL BATRAN
Si vorba lor te nauceste
BATRANE,… ce-ti mai trebuieste ?
Copile, tu sa ai stiinta

Am fost un tata cu credinta
Si din putin, de-a fost sa fie
Eu am rabdat, si ti-am dat tie
Dar fa-mi, te rog, o bucurie
La cimitir, de vii la mine
Sa-mi zici ca in copilarie
TATICULE, mi-e dor de tine….

si dintr-un comentariu la acelasi articol:


Privesc spre casa-n care m-am născut.
Ce amintiri trezește panorama !…
Încerc să retrăiesc tot ce-am avut
Copil fiind la tata și la mama.

Tabloul este încă viu și în mișcare,
Mai veche și mai roasă-mi pare rama.
Dar ce contează-n dulcea-mi evocare
Când eu vorbesc de tata și de mama !

Ma văd suit cu-amicii-n vârf de deal
Prin “coturi” rătăcind, (pe vale) nu luam seama !
Dar seara când sosea trăiam iar ideal :
Eram acasa cu tata și cu mama !

E-o muzicalitate-acolo ce-o ador
Întrepătrund acordurile, chiar și gama…
Ah, timpurile ce-au trecut…Și azi mi-e dor
De când cântam cu tata și cu mama !

În casa mea sărăcăcioasă de la țară
Era un “Foc aprins”. Și-acum mă ține Flama !
Mă mistuie-n străfunduri, dă pe-afară…
Era aprins de tata și de mama !

Pe casa-n care m-am născut și am pruncit
Atât a mai rămas, doar monograma…
Dar amintirile de-atunci m-au răscolit,
Că-s amintiri cu tata și cu mama !

Îmbătrânim. Și gândurile, ca săgeți, ne ard.
Cu-atât rămânem și mă umple teama
Că vine-o zi când singur lângă-un gard
Voi plânge după tata…după mama !

Dar va veni o altă Glorioasă Zi
Când Domnu-Și va deschide Vama.
Atunci să nu mă mai căutați pentru că voi fi
Acolo sus, Acasă, cu tata și cu mama !

Nelu Aliman


(O parabolă contemporană inspirată din 2 Timotei)

Mă numesc Timotei și am crescut într-o familie de greci din Timișoara. Tatăl meu, Pavel, care nu stă prea bine cu sănătatea, deţine compania pe care a înfiinţat-o tatăl lui şi care a pornit de la o mică afacere de familie, ajungînd un concern internațional cu multă influență. Tatăl meu conduce acestă companie şi eu o voi moşteni de la tatăl meu, aşa cum şi el a moştenit-o de la tatăl lui. Noi producem cel mai bun sistem din lume pentru întreţinerea vieţii. Nu mai există nimic similar, fără acest sistem oamenii ar muri. Datorită acestei capacităţi de a susţine viaţa, tatăl meu a considerat această afacere nu atît de mult ca fiind a lui proprie, ci mai degrabă un bun încredinţat de o valoare inestimabilă de care trebuie să aibă grijă şi să îl transmită în siguranţă generaţiei următoare…

Preaiubitul meu fiu, clipa plecării mele este aproape, te rog fierbinte să-ți amintești întotdeauna sfaturile mele:


  • Păstrează producţia nealterată şi de cea mai bună calitate.Nu ai cum s-o îmbunătăţeşti şi nu e nimic care să se compare cu ea, însă tu trebuie să o prezinţi şi să o pui pe piaţă în mod corespunzător şi cu sensibilitate către cei pentru care reprezintă o problemă de viaţă și de moarte .
  • Nu ceda niciodată presiunilor concurenţei…..


…mai mult pe www.baptist-tm.ro

(Traducere și adaptare Cornelia Mihai și Samy Tuțac, după un text scris de Wayne E. Shaw)

La multi ani tuturor taticilor ! – Happy Father’s Day !

„Un tata nu este o ancora care ne tine inapoi, ci e o lumina calauzitoare a carui iubire ne arata calea.”

Crescusem. si tot nu-mi venea sa cred ca tata e muritor.
Valeriu Butulescu

Cel mai important lucru pe care un tata il poate face pentru copiii lui este sa o iubeasca pe mama acestora.
Theodore Hesburgh

Psalms 127:3-5  Behold, children are a heritage from the LORD, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one’s youth. Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate.

Proverbs 23:24  The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice; he who fathers a wise son will be glad in him.

Proverbs 20:7  The righteous who walks in his integrity—blessed are his children after him!

1Thessalonians 2:11-12 For you know how, like a father with his children, we exhorted each one of you and encouraged you and charged you to walk in a manner worthy of God, who calls you into his own kingdom and glory.

Proverbs 10:1 The proverbs of Solomon. A wise son makes a glad father, but a foolish son is a sorrow to his mother.

Luke 15:20 -23  And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him. And the son said to him, ‘Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. But the father said to his servants, ‘Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and cet us eat and celebrate. For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.’ And they began to celebrate.

Proverbs 19:18 Discipline your son, for there is hope; do not set your heart on putting him to death.

Colossians 3:21 Fathers, do not provoke your children, lest they become discouraged.


Lazar Gog – Ce inseamna sa fi pazit de tata

E mare lucru sa lupte Domnul pentru tine. Este mare lucru. Citeam despre istoria acestui tata. Spunea: Copilul meu, nascut intr-o familie de credinciosi, un copil cuminte. Dar, in scolile primare din aceste zile, si in liceu, este un grup special, numit „the bullies”, aia care trerorizeaza pe ceilalti elevi. Ii bat, le ia mancarea. Zice: Copilul meu, pentru ca e un copil linistit, bully din scoala il batea aproape in fiecare zi si-i lua mancarea. Si copilul n-a vrut sa mai mearga la scoala.

Tot i-am spus: „Uite, ne rugam Domnului. Ne rugam Domnului si Dumnezeu va lucra.”
„Tati, nu lucreaza, pe mine ma bat in fiecare zi.”
Si atunci, a zis: „Mi-a venit un gand si a zis: ‘Uite, te mai duci odata la scoala si daca nici de data asta nu lucreaza, atunci schimbam scoala. Si acuma, punem doua luch-uri cu tine. (doua pranzuri) si unul din pranzurile care le punem cu tine, le dai la ala care te bate si unu il mananci tu si o sa vezi ca o sa fie bine.'”

Copilul n-a fost convins, dar ce sa faca, a trebuit sa mearga la scoala. S-a dus la scoala si cand s-a apropiat de scoala, ca de obicei, bully i-a iesit in fata. Sa-l bata si sa-i ia mancarea, de la bun inceput. Dar, dintr-o data, copilul, spre surprinderea lui, a vazut ca acest urias, care-i facea lui probleme in fiecare zi, acest coleg, se uita cu o groaza, se da inapoi.

Se uita cu groaza, se da inapoi, si zice copilul in inima lui (ii povestea tatalui), „Nici nu i-am spus ca am adus doua pranzuri si deja se da inapoi. Si apoi, fara sa se gandeasca, s-a intors sa vada, cine il vede, cat e el de brav? Si stiti? Tatal lui era in spatele lui. Tata nu i-a spus: „Uite, vin si eu sa vad ce se intampla.”

Era pazit de tata. Nu s-a mai intamplat nimic cu copilul acela. Din ziua aceea s-au facut prieteni. Ei, asa este Dumnezeu. El este cu noi. Si apoi, cand cel rau Il vede, se roaga sa-l mai lase un pic, ca sa n-ajunga in iad. Dar Domnul poate trimite in iad dinainte de vreme. Bucura-te de lucrul acesta. Si de aceea, poate sa-ti dea biruinta.

Citeste mai departe aici…


Happy Father’s Day – A Father’s Day Request (VIDEO)

This brief mini movie expresses appreciation for dads while also asking a Father’s Day favor: „Would you pray for us?”

Available at https://shiftworship.com/product/fath..

VIDEO by Shift Worship

The importance of Fathers by James Buchanan

via http://www.sermoncentral.com from  Judges 2:6-2:12  Romans 1:28-1:32 

Pentru traducere automata, fa click aici – Romanian

The father of five children had won a toy at a raffle. He called his kids together to ask which of them should have the present. „Who is the most obedient?” he asked. „Who never talks back to mother? Who does everything she says?” Five small voices answered in unison. „Okay, dad, you get the toy.”

Today is the day that we honor fathers. That’s me! Honor me! Yea!

In all seriousness, we are to honor our fathers, and our mothers, and this day in June is set aside for us to honor the fathers in this country. But we are to honor our fathers, not because it’s a holiday, not because it’s a tradition, not because there are sales going on all over the country, but because God said so.

In fact, he said so very specifically. The bible tells us in Ephesians 6:1-3, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise— 3 “that it may go well with you and that you may enjoy long life on the earth.”

Notice that it doesn’t say, honor only good moms and dads. It doesn’t say, honor them if you like them. It doesn’t say, honor only the right ones. It says, “honor your father and mother.” And so, today, we ought to honor all fathers.

But I want to speak directly to the dads here today. And if you’re not a dad, don’t check out, because we all need to hear this. You see, we are involved in a war today, and the battleground is not in Iraq or Afghanistan. The battleground is in our homes. And what’s at stake is not our land, our property, our freedoms. It’s more important that than. What’s at stake are our children.

And believe me—it’s a war, it’s an important war, and in this country, we are losing the battle. Children are turning from the faith in record numbers. It’s as if as soon as they leave home and go to college they leave the church. And if you don’t believe me, look here this morning. And lest you think that its only a problem here, it is true all over this country. Children in record numbers are turning from God.

But it’s nothing new. It’s the same as been happening over the course of time. I want to tell you a brief Biblical story this morning that’s going to be our guide for the remaining time we have today—and I’ll be brief. It’s found in the book of Judges in the Old Testament. Genesis, exodus, Leviticus, numbers, Deuteronomy, Joshua, Judges. In the pew bible it’s found on page _______________. Judges 2: 6 -12

Let me give you a little background here today. The nation of Israel had just marched into the promised land, and they were settling into the land. Now, it wasn’t a complete victory, because when they went in, they didn’t always follow what God desired, and instead of conquering all of it, they instead settled into some of it. And just before what we’re going to look at, they were instructed that they didn’t do what God desired, and they repented of it. With that in mind, let’s read this important passage this morning. Judges 2:6-12.

After Joshua had dismissed the Israelites, they went to take possession of the land, each to his own inheritance. 7 The people served the LORD throughout the lifetime of Joshua and of the elders who outlived him and who had seen all the great things the LORD had done for Israel.
8 Joshua son of Nun, the servant of the LORD, died at the age of a hundred and ten. 9 And they buried him in the land of his inheritance, at Timnath Heresa in the hill country of Ephraim, north of Mount Gaash.
10 After that whole generation had been gathered to their fathers, another generation grew up, who knew neither the LORD nor what he had done for Israel. 11 Then the Israelites did evil in the eyes of the LORD and served the Baals. 12 They forsook the LORD, the God of their fathers, who had brought them out of Egypt. They followed and worshiped various gods of the peoples around them.

Once Joshua and his generation passed away, the next generation turned their back on God and worshiped the gods of the peoples around them. Today, in 2004, they don’t wait for mom and dad to pass on. They turn away immediately, and worship the god of television. They worship the god of fashion. They worship the god of convenience. They worship the god of this world. They worship the world. What is the world, 1 John 2:16 tells us. For the world offers only the lust for physical pleasure, the lust for everything we see, and pride in our possessions. These are not from the Father. They are from this evil world. (NLT)

In your notes is a passage from Romans 1:28-32 that closely parallels what is going on today in America. Let’s look at that together.

Furthermore, since they did not think it worthwhile to retain the knowledge of God, he gave them over to a depraved mind, to do what ought not to be done. 29 They have become filled with every kind of wickedness, evil, greed and depravity. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit and malice. They are gossips, 30 slanderers, God-haters, insolent, arrogant and boastful; they invent ways of doing evil; they disobey their parents; 31 they are senseless, faithless, heartless, ruthless. 32 Although they know God’s righteous decree that those who do such things deserve death, they not only continue to do these very things but also approve of those who practice them.

Do you realize we live in a culture that approves of turning its back on God? From court cases to tv to popular movies, it’s okay to make fun of religion, because it’s not important, it’s not relevant. It worked for mom and dad, but it’s not for me.

Well, can I tell you this morning, moms and dads, you are at the front lines. This is a war, and we are called to be a part. This morning, I want to give you your marching orders to tackle this important task of saving the children, and we are going to look briefly at a few steps that will help us to do so.

How can we win the war? Three suggestions this morning.

1. With our words.

Deuteronomy 6: These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. 7 Impress them on your children.

You need to talk to you children. Be involved in their lives. Tell them about God, and tell them about the Bible. Remember last week we talked about your story. What God has done for you, so that you can share it with others. Are you sharing it with your children, what God has done for you? You need to, you ought to.

A study was done recently to determine the amount of interaction between fathers and their small children. First, the fathers were asked to estimate the amount of time they spent each day communicating with their child. The average answer was about fifteen to twenty minutes. Next, microphones were attached to the father so that each interaction could be recorded. The results of this study were shocking: The average amount of time spent by these middle-class fathers with their small children was thirty-seven seconds per day. Their direct interaction was limited to 2.7 encounters daily, lasting ten to fifteen seconds each!

Look back at Deuteronomy 6 again with me. Can that be accomplished in 37 seconds a day? Do you want to know how much time the culture has with your children? 37 seconds does not come close to meeting the job. Communicate with your children; tell them about God and about the Bible.

Proverbs 1: Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction
and do not forsake your mother’s teaching.

Don’t let the schools be the only thing that instruct the children. Don’t even let this church be the only thing that instructs your children. And that’s not an indictment on the teaching ministry of this church, but mom and dad, we are not responsible for raising your kids. We will help you, but when the bible tells us to Trainu a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it—that’s not to the church, that’s to parents.

Dad’s, how are you doing with your words? Are you fighting?

2. With our time.

Robert Schuller, pastor of the Crystal Cathedral, once said that he chose to fail so he could succeed. He said, „I chose to fail at golf, because I wanted to succeed as a father.” Though he loved golf immensely, he knew that he could never devote adequate time to his job, his hobby, and his family . . . so he gave up his hobby.

How are you doing with your time? We looked at Deuteronomy 6, but let’s look again at verses 7 and following: Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up. 8 Tie them as symbols on your hands and bind them on your foreheads. 9 Write them on the doorframes of your houses and on your gates.

Dad’s, do you want to know what is important in your life today? Look at your daytimer, your palm pilot, your schedule, and where your time is devoted to, that’s what is important. Unfortunately, many dads say that by their time they love their jobs. They love their hobbies. They love their entertainment, their comfort. If you asked them if they loved their children, they would swear to you that they do. But their time doesn’t match up.

And some of you have bought into the thinking of this world. I’ve got to keep working and working and working so I can provide for them the finer things of this world, and providing for family is important and biblical,

8If anyone does not provide for his relatives, and especially for his immediate family, he has denied the faith and is worse than an unbeliever. But I think that we sometimes go beyond what is necessary.

There’s a story told of a man asking his daughter if she would want quality time with her dad or quantity time with her dad. She replied, “Quality time, Dad, and lots of it!”

I read about a little girl who drew a pretty picture. She went in her dad’s office. Crawled on his lap. And said, „Daddy, come and see my picture.”

And the dad said, „Not now, honey. Dad’s busy.”

About 10 minutes later, she came back again. Crawled on his lap. And said,”Daddy, will you come see my picture now?”

And the dad got frustrated. And said, „Can’t you see I’m busy? Don’t bother me right now. I’ll come and look at your picture later. When I’m ready.”

A couple of hours later, the dad came out. And he said to the daughter, „Can I see the picture now?” And the girl said, „Sure.” And it was a picture of her and her brother and her mom standing on the lawn. With the family dog. With big smiles. On a sunny day. But the dad noticed that he wasn’t in the picture. And so the dad said, „That’s a nice picture, sweetheart. But how
come I’m not in the picture?”

And the girl said, „Because you’re working in your office, daddy.”

Time is a gift you give that you can never get back. You can give money, and always make more. You can give gifts, because you can always get new things anyway. But once time is given, it never comes back. Time reveals the priorities in your life. And if you want to win the war with for your children, you’ve got to invest time.

3. With your lives.

Genesis 18:18-19 is a revealing passage—we even looked at it last year as our prime text for father’s day. And I want to remind you of what it says to us today. Abraham will surely become a great and powerful nation, and all nations on earth will be blessed through him. 19 For I have chosen him, so that he will direct his children and his household after him to keep the way of the LORD by doing what is right and just.

The way you live your life will be a direct reflection of how your children will grow up. There’s a song, I even sang it last year, called, “I want to be just like you.” It goes like this—I want to be just like you, cause he wants to be just like me. I want to be a holy example for his innocent eyes to see. Help me be a living Bible, Lord, that my little boy can read. I want to be just like you, cause he wants to be like me.”

I can see that now, in my son. 17 months old, and he desires to be like me. He’ll repeat words I say, he’ll repeat things I do—he loves me, and at this point, he wants to be just like me. I’d better be the right kind of dad, because he will mirror me.

It’s kind of like this situation—A little boy was caught swearing like a sailor. „Young man, where did you learn to talk that way?” said the boy’s mother. The boy looked at his father and said, „Well, Dad, should I tell her?”

2 Kings 14:3 speaks of a king of Israel named Amaziah. “He did what was right in the eyes of the LORD…. In everything he followed the example of his father Joash.”

What kind of example are you setting for your kids? You words may say some things about you, but your life declares who you really are. Are you fighting the war with your lives?

As we wrap up, let me speak to the kids here today. Life isn’t always what we want, and it isn’t always what’s best, and it isn’t always pleasing to God. There are some of you here this morning who have fathers who aren’t all that great, or maybe not even there?

How can you honor your father, even when it’s difficult? How can you go through life without a good father?

Let me suggest to you something this morning. God calls the church his family. And here this morning, there are lots of good, godly dads. I would suggest to you that you go and adopt a dad. Not literally (Can you be my dad, and move in with us), but you know, go up to him and say, “I need a dad, someone I can look up to for advice and help, and I think you’d be a good dad.” And dads, if someone comes up to you and asks that, you know how you are to respond.

Well, it was a typical scenario of young boys debating whose father was the best. This discussion highlighted who their fathers knew. The first boy started the debate by claiming his father knew the mayor. He was soon topped by the second boy who said, „That’s nothing. My dad knows the governor.” The stakes were getting pretty high, and the eavesdropping father wondered what his young son would say about him. The little boy shot back, „So what! My dad knows God!” Would your son say the same thing? May our children always be able to say, „My dad knows God!”

How are you fighting the battle? Maybe you need to start today, by apologizing to your kids, and starting anew. Let’s pray.

Dor de Tata

Photo credit Proconsul

An Essential Talk on Manhood

Pentru traducere automata, fa click aici – Romanian

by Bruce Ware

The following was posted at the blog of The Gospel Coalition (04/20/2010):

Theologian Bruce Ware just gave a noteworthy talk on godly manhood at his church, Clifton Baptist Church of Louisville, Kentucky.  The talk was entitled “Select Principles on Being a Biblically Faithful Man and Husband”.  I heard the talk and commend the audio to you.  The following is the handout given out at the talk.  The handout alone is one of the most helpful documents I’ve seen on what godly manhood looks like.

1. Love.   1) Loving God increasingly w/ all my heart, soul, mind and strength; loving Christ and the cross; loving the gospel — these are the foundation for all else.  Drawing from God all I need to be the man and husband God has called me to be is my strength and hope.  2) Loving my wife as Christ loves the Church — this is the umbrella principle for marriage; everything else flows from this responsibility and privilege (Eph 5:25ff).

2. Leadership.   Biblical manhood involves cultivating, embracing, and exercising leadership initiative, especially spiritual leadership initiative.  This is a principle that applies to young men and adult single men just as well as to married men.  Cultivate, embrace, and exercise spiritual leadership initiative.   In marriage, my love for my wife involves and requires that I exert leadership in our relationship.  My headship of my wife means I’m responsible for her spiritual growth and well-being.  And as a father, I’m responsible in ways that my wife is not for the spiritual development of our children (Eph 6:1-4).  And again, to do this, I must be seeking God and growing personally.  Only out of the storehouse of my own soul’s growth in God can I assist my wife to grow spiritually.

3. Example.  Lead by example as much as by admonition and instruction.  Set the example in:  consistent times in the Word and prayer;  in sacrificial service for your wife, children, church family members, and community needs;  in giving faithfully, generously, and regularly of your finances;  in humble admission of wrong-doing along with confession, asking forgiveness, and repentance.  Fight pride, fight defensiveness, fight carnality before others.

4. Authority.  All three points above imply and invoke the concept of male-headship.  Yes, God has given special authority to husbands and fathers.  Learn, though, the correct expression of healthy, constructive, upbuilding, God-honoring, Christ-following authority.  Resist and reject the sinful extremes of 1) harshness, bossiness, mean-spirited authoritarianism, and of 2) laziness, apathy, lethargy, negligence, and abdication of authority to the women in our lives.  Learn to blend firmness with gentleness, truth with grace, a firm hand with a warm smile.

5. Acceptance.   Each of us is unique as God has made us.  We should accept others’ differences w/o thinking ourselves to be either superior or inferior to others.  In marriage, my wife is unique, and so in many ways, she is not like me.  I need to accept who she is, prayerfully and sensitively seeking to assist her in changing what is sinful and needs to be changed, and accepting what is “just different.”

6. Listening.   One of my wife’s biggest and most real needs is my attentive and respectful listening ear.  She loves to share her experiences, thoughts, ideas, feelings, concerns, hurts, joys, etc.   I can minister to my wife more than one might think by offering her caring, responsive, and respectful listening and interaction.  Learn to listen sympathetically w/o rushing to “fix it” solutions.  Connect first heart to heart, then later heart to head.  Establish regular times of mutual sharing (yes, mutual), keep short accounts, and act on what you hear and learn.

7. Understanding.   I need to live with my wife in an understanding way (1 Pet 3:7), to learn her needs, her sensitivities.  I should seek to know the desires and felt needs of my wife and, when appropriate and possible, fulfill these.  I need to discover her “language of love” and make every effort to love her in ways she feels loved.

8. Work.   A man’s main sense of identity, responsibility, and purpose is found in his work.  Wives want to take pride in their husbands, and taking pride in their work is an important part of this.  Women are not meant to bear the financial weight of a marriage or family, so husbands must work hard and responsibly.  As important as work is to a man’s identity and fulfillment, we must not allow work to overshadow our commitment to and time with our wives first, and also to our children.  Work hard, work well, work to the honor of Christ, and then put work to rest.

9. Sexuality.   My wife is my only legitimate sexual experience, and I am hers.  So, learning to love sexually with increasing skill and pleasure is vitally important to the satisfaction and intimacy of our marriage.  See human sexuality for what it is — the good gift of God to be experienced in marriage, as God has designed.

10. Home.   She cares much about our home.   The “honey-do” list is far more important to her than she is likely to let on.  In love for her, I must pay attention to her requests and treat them as important.  But more important even than this is cultivating the “culture” and “ethos” of our home.  Develop an atmosphere of appreciation, respect, kindness, service, holiness, happiness, gratefulness, contentment, forgiveness — all as expressions of our love for God and one another.

My only other word on the talk would be that in the case of Dr. Ware, these words are backed up by a faithful life.  It’s one thing to hear people talk about manhood directed to the glory of God; it’s another to live it.  Dr. Ware excels at husbanding, fathering, leading, and teaching.  He has much to teach you and me, and I hope that these resources bless you and contribute to the revival of robust biblical manhood in our day.

Happy Father’s Day 2013 – poems, songs, messages honoring FATHERS

via Zondervan

Proverbs 23:24

 The father of the righteous will greatly rejoice;
he who fathers a wise son will be glad in him.

Malachi 4:6
He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers

Proverbs 23:22
Listen to your father, who gave you life,

Proverbs 23:24
The father of a righteous man has great joy;
he who has a wise son delights in him

photo via imgfave.com

father with baby,father son,fathers day

My Earthly Dad

With these three words,
„Dear Heavenly Father,”
I begin my every prayer,
But the man I see
While on bended knee
Is always my earthly dad.

He is the image
Of the Father divine
Reflecting the nature of God,
For his love and care
And strong faith laid bare
Pointed me to my Father above.

–Mary Fairchild

Dad, I’m watching you

(For all parents, moms too)

Uploaded by  on Dec 21, 2008

Psalm 103:13 
As a father has compassion on his children, so the LORD has compassion on those who fear him;(NIV)

Proverbs 23:22 
Listen to your father, who gave you life,
and do not despise your mother when she is old.

Proverbs 23:24
The father of a righteous man has great joy;
he who has a wise son delights in him.

Ephesians 6:4 
Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. (NIV)

Colossians 3:21 
Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged. (NIV)

Hebrews 12:7
Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? (NIV)

~~~~Things our fathers told us~~~~

via twentytwowords.com

Psalms 78:2-8 ESV

I will open my mouth in a parable; I will utter dark sayings from of old, (3) things that we have heard and known, that our fathers have told us.

(4) We will not hide them from their children, but tell to the coming generation the glorious deeds of the LORD, and his might, and the wonders that he has done.

(5) He established a testimony in Jacob and appointed a law in Israel, which he commanded our fathers to teach to their children, (6) that the next generation might know them, the children yet unborn, and arise and tell them to their children, (7) so that they should set their hope in God and not forget the works of God, but keep his commandments; (8) and that they should not be like their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation, a generation whose heart was not steadfast, whose spirit was not faithful to God.

photo by myorkutglitter.com

There are many ways the Scriptures describe those who love God and obey Him. We are heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ (Romans 8:17); we are holy priests (1 Peter 2:5); we are new creations (2 Corinthians 5:17); and we are partakers of the divine nature (2 Peter 1:4). But more significant than any title or position is the simple fact that we are God’s children and He is our Heavenly Father.

Published on May 16, 2012 by mariliss1

Video of the week – DAD I’M WATCHING YOU – A Father’s Day message

Uploaded by  on Dec 21, 2008

Happy Father’s Day and Dad, I’m watching you…

Malachi 4:6
He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers

Proverbs 23:22
Listen to your father, who gave you life,

Proverbs 23:24
The father of a righteous man has great joy;
he who has a wise son delights in him

My Earthly Dad

With these three words,
„Dear Heavenly Father,”
I begin my every prayer,
But the man I see
While on bended knee
Is always my earthly dad.

He is the image
Of the Father divine
Reflecting the nature of God,
For his love and care
And strong faith laid bare
Pointed me to my Father above.

–Mary Fairchild


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